Rains make Chennai very strange

Strange is the ways of the world...

True story this,,

As you all no, Chennai has been under severe weather strains and i have said enough bout the nastiness of the same to the people around me, but anyway, i will recount the strange ways of the people of this city, particularly of the people living in and around Srinivasa Murthy Avenue. Adyar

Water stagnation is a common problem in our city and our street is no different. What is different is that our street actually has pavements, which surprisingly people don't use. Now, because of the rains, the streets are flooded and well one would assume that footpath would be put to good use. But, here is the snag. Couple of days back(last Friday) i think, the street was ankle deep in water. There was this lady who was walking a bit ahead of me. Now when you see ankle deep water and a very narrow patch of dry area(adjoining to a house) what do you do? Take the narrow path right? Yes the path is narrow, one needs to maneuver a bit carefully so as not to slip and fall. But nevertheless, it is the easier path right? But no, this lady waddled in the water the entire stretch of the road, by now i had caught up with her in the sense, i was walking on the narrow pathway and she was in the middle of the road. She saw me, but made no move to come to the dry land. So i thought, maybe she likes to waddle in water..

Then today, due to late night showers the roads were flooded but not that much. Again i took the footpath, but there was this middle aged man who was walking ahead of me in water. I crossed him, he saw me but continued to walk on water. (;p) 

Now, could it be coincidence that these 2 people enjoy waddling and getting wet in dirty murky water? No, This is a phenomena very common on the streets, I have noticed this couple of times elsewhere too. I seek the dry patches. Willing to climb parapets to remain dry but people continue to splash around in muck. 

Truly, Strange is the way of the city of Chennai. 

Seat up! Seat down! Seat around around and around!

Ok. I am a girl. For clarification. No no.. Not invoking Britney Spears. Lets dive in!


As far back as i can remember, i have always left my seat up. What seat? Toilet seat of course. I, as a rule sit on the ceramic part of the potty and not on the plastic. Is that too much information? Well this article is about toilet etiquette.

My backside will weep blood if sit on the plastic for long, and as all my friends/family will vouch, i do take my time in the potty. Not because i have irregular bowels, that too, but often because i read in the potty. :) So if i sit on the plastic for as long as i do, the elliptical shape of the seat will forever be etched on my backside. Now that is not a good prospect. I don't really remember when is started doing that, and i never really paid attention to it, until one Friends episode made me think. Sometime in the later part of the series, don't really remember which season accurately, Rachel asks Joey to put the seat down after finishing his business.   When i saw that episode i thought "Hy, Whats that about toilet seat?" and i figured she (Rachel) was talking about the exterior rim.

Flash forward to 2009.

My roommate during my master's in the US, one day randomly pointed out
"Mri, you do it like a man"
"Excuse me"
"You leave the seat up, like a man"
(See, we have separate toilets, 2 people, 2 bedrooms, 2 toilets. Her's attached, mine not. I was brushing my teeth when she walked by and decided to make this super astonishing statement.After that day, i never leave my toilet door open. Ever. )
"What man?"
"Mri, usually when men use the toilet, they sit on the ceramic, and leave the toilet seat up after"
"Oh?... Oh!" Now i get what rachel meant.
"So, you don't sit on the ceramic?"
"Nope" and she walked off, leaving me in a very pensive mood.

Since then, i have made it  a point to ask my friends/family at random times if they sit on the ceramic, and at all times the reply was "nope". So does that mean i am the only one  that "Does it like a man". Who decided what etiquette men and women must follow when they poo?No one ever told me that I as a girl should sit on the plastic. Do parents teach their children that? I obviously cannot be alone on this issue right?

After all the huffing and puffing and little cursing, i am  just glad that i was able to get it out of my system. Here is where one use the phrase, "The end justifies the means" and it would be just so perfect.


P.s: These days though i am very glad i sit on the ceramic. Imagine while using a public toilet, I will sit on the cleaner part after wiping it with tissue of course and the rest? Yada yada. Even thinking about it makes me go eewwww...Ahahaha.

India a superpower? : The joke is on us!!!

Holy Cow!2020!! 

If you have been closely following the "India's rise and rise" hogwash that politicians, corporates, foreigners and others have been feeding you, then you will be familiar with the concept of "India a superpower". Now i am a believer of the said statement. I truly believe that we as as nation, economically will become a superpower, sooner than later, political impotency notwithstanding. But, is economic development alone enough? Will eradicating poverty make us superior  or atleast on par with the western world? As the title goes, the joke is on us.

What makes a nation super? Economic freedom yes, freedom of expression? religious freedom? (mind you, i am not using the world tolerance here. Tolerance is a bucketload of crap) Adherence to law? Equality of the genders,of the sexes? What else? 

Now, our economic freedom has been on the rise for the last 2 decades. We have "everything" here, from  branded, expensive labels to chicken from kentucky and if i am to believe the government, soon walmart and tesco. As a person who has availed the services of both Walmart and Tesco whilst living abroad, i will be happy.But looks like some of our politicians are not. Oh well!Anyway getting back to the topic, these days, I am angry. Very. pretty much at everything in this country. Angry with the congress for their scams. Angry with the BJP for disrupting the parliament and wasting tax payers money. Angry with the spineless PM, with the useless opposition. Corporation, here in chennai for the garbage and the potholes and i could go on. But really, the things make me despair are much simpler. Not the government that will falter but it is the people. The very same people, who on one hand will ensure that this country raises and on the flip side will never really allow it to become great. Why you ask? I will list. :) i like making lists. 

1. Callousness: We as a nation, don't care about anything or anyone. If we did, do you honestly believe that our country would be so dirty? That we will just spit on the road? Throw the garbage on the streets? Skip traffic lights? Question the government when they bring in "wear helmet laws"Allow people to die on the roads? Oh we don't care. We don't care for the rules laid down, because we know, no-one will question us if we break them. Even by chance, someone dares to object, we beat them. bully them. Rules are meant to be broken. That should be our national motto. Not sathyameva jayate. Because, truth never ever triumphs. The one with the loudest voice, dirtiest manners, extremely poor bladder control always wins. And that is half the urban population. 


2. Misogyny:  Oh we are pathetic! Extremely pathetic.  Eve-Teasing: Blame the women. Rape: Blame the women. Oh if you are thinking only men blame the women you are wrong. This is a nation where the National council for Women blames the women if she gets teased, raped, or gets beaten up by moral police. Why? I have no answer. The only thing i have is about thousand explicits to hurl at the women of this nation. Nobody can empower you. Only YOU can empower you. I want to scream  at  every stupid, 2-bit NCW women who are apparently fighting for "the cause". Stand up, ladies of this nation. Take charge. Don't teach your daughters to cover themselves. Teach your son's not to look at a girl as an object. But sadly. In India: Misogyny is defined as when men and women hate women. Oh the shame of this nation. 

3. Religious Mis-understanding: Now as a practitioner of one faith how many of us have tried to understand another faith? We blindly teach our children to hate everyone else, and then beat our chest and say: My religion preaches tolerance and peace. Puh-Leez!!! Am i wrong? Lack of understanding(not tolerance) cultivates hatred. Stupidity cultivates hatred. Ah! how right Katju was when he said "90% of all indians are stupid"! Oh! how right he is. We are stupid. All it takes for us to go brow-beating and bash-pissing is when someone says, Hy some(Insert religion here) beat up someone of (insert another religion here).We don't verify if it really was a religion-hate filled crime, Nooo. It could have been mugging. It could have been that one guy lost his balance and fell on the other. But noooo.. We will War-cry, take sticks and start rampaging like a elephant in heat! No one can save us from that. 

4. 90% stupid people:  I will keep this simple. Blind following. Be it film star, Bollywwod/Hollywood even when they make ill-informed remarks(note: Oprah ) we listen. Politicians/Councillors spout utter rubbish we listen. In India all one needs to incite people is a mega-phone . Take it. Holler. People will throng,Nod their heads. Blindly follow and indulge in irrational mob behavior. Some biriyani and daaru on the side will help your cause. The indian public is not clever. It's just plain stupid. Remember hutch dog? Where you go it follows. Ya? The dog was cute. We are not. 

5. Netizens: Now, you might wonder. I should have included this with the one above. But indian netizens deserve special mention. They take the crown. If you read Rediff, Firstpost or any other online publications that allow comments, you know what i am talking about. Indian netizens are the worst in the world. They are ill informed, uncouth and abusive. Hiding behind a proxy name, our generally emasculated men/women turn into viagra-munching, whey-protein drinking mentally retarded assholes(Capes not withstanding). If you are against Kejirawal/Anna then you are a congress bootlicker. If you are against Baba ramdev then you are a pakistani. If your english is better than the average user than you will suffer the same fate as Raja Sen of rediif.com ( I am a big fan though). If you are against Baba Ramdev do not air it on twitter. Else suffer the same lashing as Madhu Trehan got. (Man, that women has balls.) What does that really say about us? We are spineless, Gutless, Amoral lunatics who is only capable of berating someone under a proxy. India as a nation is emasculated. Oh! i heard that the average male indian penis is 3.5cm. Belgium/Congo=8cm. So when size matters so much, You should just STFP. Oh wait a minute. Will that explain 99% of india's problem? Poor dimensions!( read length and girth) 

There are many more issues. Sexual minorities, Kamasutra, Honor protecting/Honor killing and all that i will tackle in the 2nd part of this write up. For now, One piece( A Manga/Japanese comics) is begging for attention. Will go. 

Mogambo Kush Hua!!

Mogambo Kush Hua!( No i refuse to elaborate on that. I shall direct you to wiki/youtube videos of Mogambo and  Mr. India)

Now to the point, Mogambo kush kyon hua? I shall of course elaborate on that, informing you dear reader that the aforesaid Mogambo in this context is me.

There are lot of reasons that make me happy, For instance, waking up today morning, and instead of being greeted by a harsh bright sun, i was gently bathed by the dull grey clouds(Yes, I was bathed :P) Why does that make me happy? Because for a change, i will reach office in a still-crisp shirt, devoid of sweat patches and contribute to the green cause by not using wet-wipes and dry tissues in tandem.

Drinking strong filter coffee at 8:15 sharp everyday makes me happy. The "ever-silver" tumbler that holds the purest, divinest liquid known to man and alien alike makes me want to thank that man who invented "ever-silver" and offer prayers and monetary benefits to the ghost of the man who came across the delicious beans which is coffee. Long live the Ghost of these Men!(pun intended)

Anticipating the arrival of the raws of my favorite Mangas every Wednesday makes me happy. Refreshing the websites every few minutes and to finally see the raws of those eagerly awaited chapters makes me grin and want to relieve Atlas of his burden and if the chapter turns out splendid then, apart from atlas i would also like to extend my help to the good lord above. This is a regular mid-week phenomenon.

But.............


A Bowl of rice, A laddle of curd, A spoon full of pickle, makes Mogambo the happiest ever. Before, during and after lunch Mogambo Kush Hua!!!

Hail Mogambo,
Hail Curd Rice.

Night of Drinking minus the Buzz

Q bar :

"This place better be worth it"! were the thoughts in my head, as i steered my poor little i-10 through the evening swarm of car-bees. A friend of mine finally decided to treat us on the account of her birthday (which fell month and a half prior to the writing date). She frequents Q bar in the Hilton situated right opposite the CIPET and adjacent to the Olympia tech park in Guindy. Strategic location. Considering the number of industries situated near the said area. But as i wavered through the traffic on dirt roads with the metro construction to my right and unyielding share-autos to my left, i did wonder if the timing could not have been more wrong.

The first thing that caught my attention as i finally pulled into the building was the way the uniform of the employees. A black Nehru-like-vest and a white dhoti. I was pleasantly surprised and i beamed a extra big smile at the valet. Seriously. It is such a rare phenomenon to see our traditionals men's clothing worn out of homes and i had to mention it. After enduring a strict security check, i went in and was startled and not in a good way, as i looked at the chandelier. In a lobby of pastels why-o-why would you have a chandelier of blue and pink? It had blue cubes at the top and gradually fades into pink cubes as your eyes travels down; and you wish they would stay down. Sorry i digress but its the designer in me. Before you ask, no i am not a fashion designer. Anyway my friends got annoyed with me and pulled me up to the Q bar.

Situated on the roof, is the quintessential Q bar. My first reaction was Woah! Marine drive macha. The view from the side facing the road is very similar to marine drive in bombay. hmm. ok the bend of the road is very similar to the marine drive. Ya, thats better. The bar is located to your left as soon as you enter, or if the pool makes you feel like a mariner, to the Port side. Imagine house boats in the backwaters, albeit with more seating spaces. Each individual table resembles a pergola. It has a cloth roof balanced on 4 pillars and comfortable seating chairs. The place is designed like a inverted L. So further along the line, far away from the bar and the waiters, which irked us a lot. Anyway i will get to that. As i looked around more, i did realize that chennai skyline is not speculator enough to write about.I did think, that if the bar was situated anywhere near the beach, the view would have been breathtaking. The traffic was heavy but thankfully the noise din't carry all the way up. Thank god for small mercies. We seated ourselves at the end of the L as there were hardly any body there, apart from us. From there we could see the Hyatt on the right and the sterling towers to the left. Little bit more, and i think that was LIC. Lol.

From here on, I am going into full on criticizing mood, so beware.

I mentioned before that one of my friend was a regular, well she was all praise for the service, the food and everything else there. Picture this, we were seated for twenty odd minutes; numerous hand raises and waves later, a waiter comes in. In the entire bar, there was one person handling the crowd. ONE. He hands in the menu's. From the hype that this place generated, i was expecting a decent variety of drinks. But no. They had about 8 cocktails, 8 shooters and few assorted drinks, local and imported. Thats it. For a place providing such a pleasant ambience, one would expect exotic cocktails, Cocktails that make you blush when you order. But no. They had the standard Whiskey, Scotch, rum(all imported and local) and vodkas and corresponding martini's. 4 martini variety to be exact. Its not like i am a heavy drinker, but i do like to take my time to choose my drinks. Zara has a more exhaustive menu than Q bar. If you want to try something new and exciting, this isn't the place. The worse part. The drinks were served in Acrylic plastic tumblers. Imagine drinking wine and cognac in plastic tumbler. The alcohol reacted with the plastic and gave of a pungent odor. Disappointing to say the least. The table besides us, returned their drink twice. Thats how bad the reactions were.

The food; Well the food was good, bit spicy but decent. They have about 5 salads to choose from, A range of tapas and main course had fish, lamb, paneer tikka served with garlic naan. The desert was the best part. We ordered a chocolate mousse with Jack Daniels. I mentioned that the food was spicy rite? We asked for water and got it 15 minutes and burnt tongues later. I was at one point contemplating if i should jump into the pool just to stop my tongue from fizzling out.

On a positive side, its a nice place to sit and chat with friends. If you don't mind the inept service that is.

Night out for 3: One cognac(small), one dirty martini, one melon martini, one white wine, Moroccan salad, fish tikka, panner tikka, mushroom in garlic and chocolate desert all amounted to a sum total of 7000 rs. The place was just not worth it.My friend might disagree but, it was money ill-spent.

When we exited, the streets were still full of vehicles and I two drinks later was still empty of the buzz.

The End.


I couldn't take my camera but i found some pics on the internet. Here you go.

Pergola:
Source: Popularmechanics.com 

dhoti
Source: exoticindiaart.com

Nehru Vest:
Source: inmonarch.com

    

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Drooooooooool

Q bar: http://www1.hilton.com/en_US/hi/hotel/MAAHIHI-Hilton-Chennai-hotel/dining.do#3

Address: 124/1 J.N. Salai, Ekkaduthangal, Chennai, India 600032 Tel: 91-44-222-55555    Fax:  91-44-22255700

                                                         

Dahlia: A review

Dahlia:

Situated in Kaveri complex in Nungambakkam which in itself is a violation of gazillion building and human laws is a little-known restaurant catering to the japanese living in the city and to the faux-japanese like me. Dahlia . Obscure it might be; but it is forever buzzing with activity.

To the uninitiated, Japanese food ( although the country is in the far-eat) is NOT chinese. To understand the japanese cuisine a little bit of research and some prior knowledge is required. I really get tired of people saying "japanese-chinese-all-same". My god. Are they wrong. Just because they also have noodles. Sheesh. If you enjoy the "Chinese food" in the city; then well you don't know what chinese food is really. Anyway getting back to Dahlia. It is a small restaurant, can seat bout 8 families of 4 at any one time. Blue walls, racks and racks of japanese tv serial DVD's, tatami mat-low floor seats along with typical western chairs and tables create a perfect ambiance(at least in my opinion) for a night of sheer tongue-gasm . I hog the low floor seats all the time. Man are they comfortable or what? As far as the decor goes; well thats it. Don't expect much. Like i mentioned the building in which the restaurant in situated is very old. Decor and ambience are not what the restaurant offers. People come there for only one thing and that is what they excel at; FOOD.

Right the food, They have everything that you expect from a normal japanese restaurant. Sushi, sashmi, udon, soba, donburi-set meals tempura and so on. Sushi and Sashmi are their speciality. I would also recommend Yaki-soba and Okonomiyaki. To go into details: one can order sushi platter or sashmi patter which encompasses all the sushi/sashmi varieties they have. Try the inari/fried tofu sushi as well. Japanese cuisine, everything is served as a meal; consists of a bowl of rice, miso soup and the main that you order. If that proves to be heavy just ask for the main without the rice.

If you are a vegetarian, fear not. They have a separate section for you. What udon/soba/rice they serve with meat they serve them with vegetables also. So take your vegetarian friends along with you. Sake; yes sake; cold or hot the sake is simply amazing. It is such a rare find in chennai. When i drank the sake in Dahlia i had a religious moment there. I could hear the hallelujah!! Try it. If you drink or if don't try sake. They also serve kingfisher beer(yuck). Apart from this you get the standard drink juices and teas as well. Soba especially cold soba have a special way in which it should be eaten. If you want to try the cold soba(which is beyond yummy) kindly google the method or ask them there, else you will be left eating what is essentially cold noodles.

Take note that the food takes a while to arrive. Give yourself a minimum of 1 1/2 to finish your dinner/lunch. But the time is well spent there. Constant flow of japanese coming in to eat should in itself reassure you of the quality of food provided.

Did i mention that the place is run by a indian and a japanese?

Don't have to take my word for it. Reserve a table and indulge and then become a addict just like me. Welcome to Dahlia. Welcome to a world of tongue-gasm.

notes:

Dahlia Address: Kaveri complex, 96 & 104 Nungambakkam High Road, Nungambakkam, Chennai: Phone: 28265240

Information:

1. Udon: Thick Wheat flour noodles
2. Soba: Thin buckwheat noodels
3. Sushi: rice and fish
4. Sashmi: meat strips mostly fish
5. Okonomiyaki: Pancakes made of onions and cabbage and meat (beyond yummy)

Blog contains what?

I recently moved back to chennai after living abroad for few years. Yes Yes, only few. Peter i no;

I might not have mentioned it; but i love to travel; visit new places etc etc. So then; My blogs will usually contain Restaurant reviews, Book reviews, Anime/Manga reviews, Travelogues, and whole lot of thoughts. My thoughts ; if it annoys you or you don't agree with the issues written bout, no problem as long as you don't abuse. Haters are not welcomed.

Other than that, i hope to update regularly.

Cheers,

The Geeks shall inherit the world.